Ubuntu 12.04 has no sound drivers detected, aplay, almixer, etc.

ghost@Casper:~$ wget -O alsa-info.sh http://www.alsa-project.org/alsa-info.sh && chmod +x ./alsa-info.sh && ./alsa-info.sh
--2014-12-12 17:52:22-- http://www.alsa-project.org/alsa-info.sh
Resolving www.alsa-project.org (www.alsa-project.org)... 77.48.224.243
Connecting to www.alsa-project.org (www.alsa-project.org)|77.48.224.243|:80... connected.
HTTP request sent, awaiting response... 302 Found
Location: http://git.alsa-project.org/?p=alsa-utils.git;a=blob_plain;f=alsa-info/alsa-info.sh [following]
--2014-12-12 17:52:23-- http://git.alsa-project.org/?p=alsa-utils.git;a=blob_plain;f=alsa-info/alsa-info.sh
Resolving git.alsa-project.org (git.alsa-project.org)... 77.48.224.243
Connecting to git.alsa-project.org (git.alsa-project.org)|77.48.224.243|:80... connected.
HTTP request sent, awaiting response... 200 OK
Length: unspecified [application/x-sh]
Saving to: `alsa-info.sh'

    [ <=> ] 27,812 136K/s in 0.2s

2014-12-12 17:52:24 (136 KB/s) - `alsa-info.sh' saved [27812]

WARNING: All config files need .conf: /etc/modprobe.d/alsa-base.conf.save, it will be ignored in a future release.
WARNING: All config files need .conf: /etc/modprobe.d/alsa-base.save.1, it will be ignored in a future release.
WARNING: All config files need .conf: /etc/modprobe.d/alsa-base.save, it will be ignored in a future release.
WARNING: All config files need .conf: /etc/modprobe.d/alsa-base.save.2, it will be ignored in a future release.
WARNING: /etc/modprobe.d/alsa-base.conf.save line 44: ignoring bad line starting with 'sudo'
WARNING: /etc/modprobe.d/alsa-base.conf.save line 46: ignoring bad line starting with 'cat'
WARNING: /etc/modprobe.d/alsa-base.conf.save line 49: ignoring bad line starting with 'cat'
WARNING: /etc/modprobe.d/alsa-base.conf.save line 50: ignoring bad line starting with 'sudo'
WARNING: Failed to open config file /etc/modprobe.d/alsa-base.save: Permission denied
WARNING: Failed to open config file /etc/modprobe.d/alsa-base.save.1: Permission denied
WARNING: Failed to open config file /etc/modprobe.d/alsa-base.save.2: Permission denied
ALSA Information Script v 0.4.64
--------------------------------

This script visits the following commands/files to collect diagnostic
information about your ALSA installation and sound related hardware.

  dmesg
  lspci
  lsmod
  aplay
  amixer
  alsactl
  /proc/asound/
  /sys/class/sound/
  ~/.asoundrc (etc.)

See './alsa-info.sh --help' for command line options.

cat: /proc/asound/version: No such file or directory
grep: /proc/asound/cards: No such file or directory
cat: /proc/asound/cards: No such file or directory
WARNING: All config files need .conf: /etc/modprobe.d/alsa-base.conf.save, it will be ignored in a future release.
WARNING: All config files need .conf: /etc/modprobe.d/alsa-base.save.1, it will be ignored in a future release.
WARNING: All config files need .conf: /etc/modprobe.d/alsa-base.save, it will be ignored in a future release.
WARNING: All config files need .conf: /etc/modprobe.d/alsa-base.save.2, it will be ignored in a future release.
WARNING: /etc/modprobe.d/alsa-base.conf.save line 44: ignoring bad line starting with 'sudo'
WARNING: /etc/modprobe.d/alsa-base.conf.save line 46: ignoring bad line starting with 'cat'
WARNING: /etc/modprobe.d/alsa-base.conf.save line 49: ignoring bad line starting with 'cat'
WARNING: /etc/modprobe.d/alsa-base.conf.save line 50: ignoring bad line starting with 'sudo'
WARNING: Failed to open config file /etc/modprobe.d/alsa-base.save: Permission denied
WARNING: Failed to open config file /etc/modprobe.d/alsa-base.save.1: Permission denied
WARNING: Failed to open config file /etc/modprobe.d/alsa-base.save.2: Permission denied
cat: /proc/asound/modules: No such file or directory
grep: /proc/asound/cards: No such file or directory
/sbin/alsactl: save_state:1580: No soundcards found...
cat: /tmp/alsa-info.FNsbueeq7x/alsactl.tmp: No such file or directory
Automatically upload ALSA information to www.alsa-project.org? [y/N] : y
Uploading information to www.alsa-project.org ... Done!

Your ALSA information is located at http://www.alsa-project.org/db/?f=a1555eb8556e9c97dec39a4b577a4da6fd0035e2

ghost@Casper:~$ bash alsa-info.sh --stdout
WARNING: All config files need .conf: /etc/modprobe.d/alsa-base.conf.save, it will be ignored in a future release.
WARNING: All config files need .conf: /etc/modprobe.d/alsa-base.save.1, it will be ignored in a future release.
WARNING: All config files need .conf: /etc/modprobe.d/alsa-base.save, it will be ignored in a future release.
WARNING: All config files need .conf: /etc/modprobe.d/alsa-base.save.2, it will be ignored in a future release.
WARNING: /etc/modprobe.d/alsa-base.conf.save line 44: ignoring bad line starting with 'sudo'
WARNING: /etc/modprobe.d/alsa-base.conf.save line 46: ignoring bad line starting with 'cat'
WARNING: /etc/modprobe.d/alsa-base.conf.save line 49: ignoring bad line starting with 'cat'
WARNING: /etc/modprobe.d/alsa-base.conf.save line 50: ignoring bad line starting with 'sudo'
WARNING: Failed to open config file /etc/modprobe.d/alsa-base.save: Permission denied
WARNING: Failed to open config file /etc/modprobe.d/alsa-base.save.1: Permission denied
WARNING: Failed to open config file /etc/modprobe.d/alsa-base.save.2: Permission denied
cat: /proc/asound/version: No such file or directory
grep: /proc/asound/cards: No such file or directory
cat: /proc/asound/cards: No such file or directory
WARNING: All config files need .conf: /etc/modprobe.d/alsa-base.conf.save, it will be ignored in a future release.
WARNING: All config files need .conf: /etc/modprobe.d/alsa-base.save.1, it will be ignored in a future release.
WARNING: All config files need .conf: /etc/modprobe.d/alsa-base.save, it will be ignored in a future release.
WARNING: All config files need .conf: /etc/modprobe.d/alsa-base.save.2, it will be ignored in a future release.
WARNING: /etc/modprobe.d/alsa-base.conf.save line 44: ignoring bad line starting with 'sudo'
WARNING: /etc/modprobe.d/alsa-base.conf.save line 46: ignoring bad line starting with 'cat'
WARNING: /etc/modprobe.d/alsa-base.conf.save line 49: ignoring bad line starting with 'cat'
WARNING: /etc/modprobe.d/alsa-base.conf.save line 50: ignoring bad line starting with 'sudo'
WARNING: Failed to open config file /etc/modprobe.d/alsa-base.save: Permission denied
WARNING: Failed to open config file /etc/modprobe.d/alsa-base.save.1: Permission denied
WARNING: Failed to open config file /etc/modprobe.d/alsa-base.save.2: Permission denied
cat: /proc/asound/modules: No such file or directory
grep: /proc/asound/cards: No such file or directory
/sbin/alsactl: save_state:1580: No soundcards found...
cat: /tmp/alsa-info.tVbFsvdI4l/alsactl.tmp: No such file or directory
upload=true&script=true&cardinfo=
!!################################
!!ALSA Information Script v 0.4.64
!!################################

!!Script ran on: Fri Dec 12 23:10:40 UTC 2014

!!Linux Distribution
!!------------------

Ubuntu 12.04.5 LTS \n \l DISTRIB_ID=Ubuntu DISTRIB_DESCRIPTION="Ubuntu 12.04.5 LTS" NAME="Ubuntu" ID=ubuntu ID_LIKE=debian PRETTY_NAME="Ubuntu precise (12.04.5 LTS)"

!!DMI Information
!!---------------

Manufacturer: ASUSTeK Computer INC.
Product Name:
Product Version:
Firmware Version: 3.08

!!Kernel Information
!!------------------

Kernel release: 3.13.0-41-generic
Operating System: GNU/Linux
Architecture: i686
Processor: i686
SMP Enabled: Yes

!!ALSA Version
!!------------

Driver version:
Library version: 1.0.25
Utilities version: 1.0.25

!!Loaded ALSA modules
!!-------------------

!!Sound Servers on this system
!!----------------------------

Pulseaudio:
      Installed - Yes (/usr/bin/pulseaudio)
      Running - Yes

!!Soundcards recognised by ALSA
!!-----------------------------

!!PCI Soundcards installed in the system
!!--------------------------------------

00:1f.5 Multimedia audio controller: Intel Corporation 82801DB/DBL/DBM (ICH4/ICH4-L/ICH4-M) AC'97 Audio Controller (rev 02)

!!Advanced information - PCI Vendor/Device/Subsystem ID's
!!-------------------------------------------------------

00:1f.5 0401: 8086:24c5 (rev 02)
 Subsystem: 103c:2a02

!!Modprobe options (Sound related)
!!--------------------------------

snd-atiixp-modem: index=-2
snd-intel8x0m: index=-2
snd-via82xx-modem: index=-2
snd-usb-audio: index=-2
snd-usb-caiaq: index=-2
snd-usb-ua101: index=-2
snd-usb-us122l: index=-2
snd-usb-usx2y: index=-2
snd-cmipci: mpu_port=0x330 fm_port=0x388
snd-pcsp: index=-2
snd-usb-audio: index=-2
snd-atiixp-modem: index=-2
snd-intel8x0m: index=-2
snd-via82xx-modem: index=-2
snd-usb-audio: index=-2
snd-usb-caiaq: index=-2
snd-usb-ua101: index=-2
snd-usb-us122l: index=-2
snd-usb-usx2y: index=-2
snd-cmipci: mpu_port=0x330 fm_port=0x388
snd-pcsp: index=-2
snd-usb-audio: index=-2
snd-hda-intel: model=basic
snd-hda-intel: probe_mask=1

!!Loaded sound module options
!!---------------------------

!!ALSA Device nodes
!!-----------------

crw-rw---T 1 root audio 116, 1 Dec 12 17:29 /dev/snd/seq
crw-rw---T 1 root audio 116, 33 Dec 12 17:29 /dev/snd/timer

!!Aplay/Arecord output
!!--------------------

APLAY

aplay: device_list:252: no soundcards found...

ARECORD

arecord: device_list:252: no soundcards found...

!!Amixer output
!!-------------

!!Alsactl output
!!--------------

--startcollapse--
--endcollapse--

!!All Loaded Modules
!!------------------

Module
btrfs
raid6_pq
xor
ufs
qnx4
hfsplus
hfs
minix
ntfs
msdos
jfs
xfs
libcrc32c
reiserfs
bnep
rfcomm
bluetooth
i915
drm_kms_helper
dm_multipath
ppdev
drm
scsi_dh
binfmt_misc
i2c_algo_bit
serio_raw
shpchp
video
lpc_ich
parport_pc
mac_hid
lp
parport
hid_generic
usbhid
usb_storage
hid
8139too
firewire_ohci
firewire_core
8139cp
mii
crc_itu_t
dm_mirror
dm_region_hash
dm_log

!!ALSA/HDA dmesg
!!--------------

ghost@Casper:~$ uname -r
3.13.0-41-generic

ghost@Casper:~$ sudo apt-add-repository ppa:ubuntu-audio-dev/alsa-daily
[sudo] password for ghost:
You are about to add the following PPA to your system:
 This PPA is for ALSA daily build snapshots. It is mostly used for driver snapshots, but could be used for daily lib and utility snapshots if there is demand.
 More info: https://launchpad.net/~ubuntu-audio-dev/+archive/ubuntu/alsa-daily
Press [ENTER] to continue or ctrl-c to cancel adding it

gpg: keyring `/tmp/tmpi_hCa_/secring.gpg' created
gpg: keyring `/tmp/tmpi_hCa_/pubring.gpg' created
gpg: requesting key 72B194E5 from hkp server keyserver.ubuntu.com
gpg: /tmp/tmpi_hCa_/trustdb.gpg: trustdb created
gpg: key 72B194E5: public key "Launchpad Ubuntu Audio Dev team PPA" imported
gpg: Total number processed: 1
gpg: imported: 1 (RSA: 1)
OK

I am very new at this and expected that with all the directives I followed would resolve the by updating the packages required for the sound cards, Pulseaudio, ALSA, etc. Instead I think I may have loaded unneccesary and outdated programs. I had a hell of a time trying to use my exe apps via wine and still cannot open any applications in which I have over 300 GB of.

I am learning the hardway to educate myself in the usuage of the programs but after spending 6 month's to understand the science behind syntax and linux or Python commands, I find I am 10 steps behind from where I started. I would appreciate if someone has the time with a some patience to educate me on the quickest route to comprehend the language and resolve my sound dilemma, I would be forever in your debt. I am extremely fascinated with all the programs and could use just a little guidance. Thanks ahead of time